December 9 2013 Latest news:
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Calling all Suffolk joke-tellers... Your county needs you!
After the best – and worst – one-liners were revealed at the 2013 Edinburgh Fringe Festival, we are today asking our readers to tell us their favourite jokes.
Comedian Rob Auton’s joke about a chocolate bar was named the funniest joke of the Edinburgh fringe.
He said: “I heard a rumour that Cadbury is bringing out an oriental chocolate bar. Could be a Chinese Wispa.”
Other crackers included:
“I used to work in a shoe-recycling shop. It was sole-destroying.” Alex Horne.
“My friend told me he was going to a fancy dress party as an Italian island. I said to him ‘Don’t be Sicily’.” Tim Vine.
“The Pope is a lot like Doctor Who. He never dies, just keeps being replaced by white men.” Phil Wang.
But quips that hung in the air like a bad smell included:
“I once did a gig in a zoo. I got babooned off.” Tim Vine.
“What do you call a pink flower that comes back from the dead? A re-in-carnation.” Nikhil Tiwali.
“90% of baking injuries are stress-related. There are people up and down the country having mental bake-downs.” Pat Cahill.
Now it’s over to you to comment below and give us your best gag. Be warned, though, it may end up in the roll of shame...