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Doctor Foster reads a bedtime story for tinies

PUBLISHED: 15:26 30 November 2017 | UPDATED: 15:26 30 November 2017

Is there a syringe behind that bear? Suranne Jones shrugs off Gemma Foster to read a bedtime story on CBeebies- (C) BBC

Is there a syringe behind that bear? Suranne Jones shrugs off Gemma Foster to read a bedtime story on CBeebies- (C) BBC

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Suranne Jones is set to read a bedtime story on CBeebies. But will she hold a candle to Tom Hardy? Here he is, getting everyone ready for bed with a story about a dog. Woof.

To be fair, if Doctor Foster was reading me a bedtime story, I’d definitely pay attention.

As Gemma Foster, Suranne Jones’ character was madder than a box of frogs and someone you definitely wouldn’t want to meet down a country lane when she was behind the wheel of a nearby 4x4. The last time we saw her having a meaningful conversation with a child that wasn’t her own, it was with her son’s friend and she was drinking heavily while asking him about her offspring’s sex life in an exchange which was in equal parts awkward and creepy.

So I have high hopes that Suranne will be reading her story – The Snowflake Mistake – in character when she takes her turn on the celebrity CBeebies rostrum on Friday December 15, as part of a week of star turns at bedtime.

The book, by Lou Treleaven and illustrated by Maddie Frost, is the story of the Snow Queen’s daughter, Princess Ellie, who is left in charge of a magical snowflake machine which malfunctions and leaves our heroine having to resort to making all the snowflakes individually. It’s all about how smashing it is to be individual, just like Gemma Foster. Lock your patio doors, she’s probably about to let herself in.

On December 11, children’s TV presenter Floella Benjamin will be reading I’ll Never Let You Go, by Smriti Prasadam-Halls and illustrated by Alison Brown, which is all about standing by someone you love no matter what happens (a bit like Sharon in EastEnders with Phil Mitchell. She loved him even after he went on a drunken rampage in a mini digger).

Other celebrities who will be offering their services for the bedtime wind-down include current jungle inmate Jennie McAlpine, who managed to record I Don’t Want Curly Hair! by Laura Ellen Anderson before she went down under for I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here which will be aired on December 12 and the following day JLS star and presenter JB Gill will be reading Ah-Choo! by Suzanne Lang, a story about a brother and sister who are trying to find the perfect family pet, but everything they bring home makes the little girl sneeze. Anti-histamines?

And taking the slot before Suranne is Mark Bonnar (forever Chris from Catastrophe for me) who will be introducing little ones to a fearless blue penguin in Rob Biddulph’s story Blown Away! Set on a windy day, Penguin Blue has a brand new kite – but where’s he going on his maiden flight? Answers on a postcard, please.

Sadly, Tom Hardy isn’t one of the celebrities being wheeled in to read to tinies - that’s me writing a stiff letter of complaint to Father Christmas - so here he is for old time’s sake, reading Odd Dog Out by Rob Biddulph.

CBeebies Bedtime Stories, CBeebies, 6.50pm

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