YOU hear about them reported on the news don't you?

James Marston

YOU hear about them reported on the news don't you?

They can be anything that catches a headline - Chocolate Is Good For You - Britons are Happy (or miserable) - No one believes in God - surveys are regular media fodder.

This week, dear readers, here at the Evening Star we've had a few unusual surveys pinged across the ether to our e-mail inboxes.

Apparently Cheryl Cole - not that I know who she is - has Britain's fantasy body closely followed by Danii Minogue and Nigella Lawson.

In another survey and perhaps more surprisingly, British men would rather see England win the World Cup than sleep with a page three girl and in the same poll nearly half of the male population said they would cancel their wedding for tickets for the match - ladies be warned.

However, the most amusing survey this week was the discovery that the average lady spends 76 days of her life rummaging through her handbag.

That's ever such a long time isn't it? Four and a half minutes a day apparently.

But rummaging around under pressure is also, according to the survey by a company called Bagatidy, bad for your health.

The research also found that the contents of handbags are increasing.

Nowadays high-tech work gadgets, such as mobile phones, PDAs, device chargers, laptop computers and their cables, are now regular features for the first time in most women's bags.

Other work-related items includes bulky document files, security swipe cards, and a pair of smart shoes, with women walking to work in trainers before changing to a more business-friendly and fashionable style.

But despite changing lifestyles, the greatest percentage is still taken up by old handbag favourites such as make-up, mirror, purse, tissues, perfumes, brushes, tooth paste, receipts, address book and headache pills.

Not only is all this frightfully fascinating but the survey goes on to suggest that for £18.99 you can solve all your problems and stop wasting those precious minutes by buying a Bagatidy with a four year guarantee, in a chic and elegant colour which compliments any bag.

I don't know a woman who doesn't have a handbag do you? I bet you're glad I shared all this with you today.

AS regular readers will know, I often work in the Felixstowe office - well one day a week.

It's always sunny, it's close to my small flat with sea views (distant) and I get to have an ice cream. Last week I even met a fan.

Well I say “met a fan” but really all that happened was a lady walked past the office just as I was popping out for a mid morning cigarette and she didn't look too impressed I can tell you.

“What a nasty habit. Just stop instead of writing about it.” she said before walking away. That told me didn't it?

Our editor Nigel who indulges my many whims, including working in the comfort of Felixstowe away from Ipswich, has since dubbed me the Felixstowe pimpernel - a nomenclature I'm rather taken with.

The other day, as I insisted I was very much nose to the grindstone thank you very much and almost definitely never use the opportunity to visit the beach or top up my tan or do some weeding, he said: “Do you sit in a deck chair eating chips all day or do you actually get any work done?”

What a question! I was mortally affronted.

I've tried to tell him that though I like chips I couldn't eat them all day.

I'm not sure he's totally convinced.

CAN you believe its July already?

How unbelievable? One minute it's February, then you turn round and we're in the middle of summer.

My friend Mark, who's due to marry next year, has a theory that from the age of 21 onwards time speeds up at an ever increasing rate.

As soon as you lose the long summers of your childhood then your life is whisked away before your very eyes.

Now, as I reach my very, very late twenties, I think he's right.

I'm terrified to go to bed in case I wake up and it's December.

I WAS delighted to spend a little time caravanning with a group of theatrical chums from the Edwardian seaside town of Felixstowe over in Rendlesham Forest.

Have you been in a caravan recently? Well they've come on a long way I can tell you.

With a back bathroom, including full shower, and an l-shaped lounge configuration, not to mention the omni-light -these modern caravans are ever so luxurious.

There always plenty of storage facilities - you have to keep putting things away - as well as the full benefits of piped music, perfect for show tunes, and a bar.

As you can see I took to the Romany way of life in an instant.

Naturally I didn't stay overnight in case the novelty wore off.

IT'S not something us journalists like to admit to.

But every now and again, once in a while, just ever so occasionally and despite being always right we make the odd mistake.

Thankfully I've managed to avoid too many in my so far illustrious career.

But writing Def Leopard instead of Def Leppard, mistaking Andrea Bocelli for Andre Bocelli, saying “Mick who?” to Mick Hucknall when I was interviewing him and asking McFly how the five of them get on when they are touring to be told by the lad at the other end of the phone “There are four of us, mate” have all, it's true, been errors on my part.

My colleague Mike, who enjoys golf in his spare time, has recently told me to be careful about my its and it's.

I told him “Its is a minefield isn't it?

“It is” he replied

I'm no further forward.