Family's heartache at son's death

A HEARTBROKEN mum who watched her son lose his battle with cancer while she won hers has today told of her utter devastation.The whole Bagley family is still struggling to come to terms with reality after a year of nightmares which ended tragically when 20-year-old Shaun died.

A HEARTBROKEN mum who watched her son lose his battle with cancer while she won hers has today told of her utter devastation.

The whole Bagley family is still struggling to come to terms with reality after a year of nightmares which ended tragically when 20-year-old Shaun died.

Shaun had been diagnosed with cancer in August and soon after his mum, 43-year-old Julie, was told she had breast cancer.

But while Julie recovered, Shaun's condition deteriorated until the family were told a few months ago there was nothing more that could be done. He died last Wednesday.

Mrs Bagley, of Crabbe Street, Ipswich, said she often felt guilt that she was alive while her son, who helped her so much though her illness, was dead.

She said: “You ask 'why him, why has it taken him?'

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“You can't prepare yourself for losing a child. We put this wall up ever since we were told he probably wouldn't recover.

“You don't believe it's going to happen. You think he'll get better.”

She said Shaun, a former Copleston High School pupil who was training as a bricklayer before he fell ill, had been a wonderful, thoughtful and joyful son and a great elder brother to Ashley, Matthew and Damian.

Shaun's dad, Andrew, broke down in tears as he spoke of his love for his son.

He said: “You think 'what have we done to deserve this?' This is the worst feeling ever.

“We're a loving and supportive family - we're all close which is why this has been so hard.

“We love him so much we hurt. We'll always be with him, as soon as I wake up my thoughts are with him.”

And he added that the situation was made even more unbearable because of the confusion over the type of cancer that killed Shaun.

Originally the family had been told he had a type of cancer called neuroendocrine which is rare and hard to cure as it affects the gland system of the body.

However after some tests they were told Shaun actually had testicular cancer which is easier to treat, giving them hope that his life could be saved.

But once the family saw the doctor's report following Shaun's death it said he had neuroendocrine cancer.

Mr Bagley added: “We feel we've been given hope when we shouldn't have been.”

But he added that he was pleased to have had the last year with Shaun as the family spent time together on holiday and enjoying meals, arranged by Shaun.

Would you like to pay a tribute to Shaun Bagley? Write to Your Letters, Evening Star, 30 Lower Brook Street, Ipswich IP4 1AN or e-mail eveningstarletters@eveningstar.co.uk.

Shaun's funeral will be held on Tuesday at 11am at Alan Road Methodist Church before moving to the Millennium Cemetery. Donations can be made to Somersham Ward Support Group c/o Michael Smy Funeral Directors, 145 Felixstowe Road, Ipswich IP3 8EB.

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