A FATHER-of-three who gave himself up to police after viewing thousands of sick internet pictures of children began telling his story in The Evening Star yesterday.

A FATHER-of-three who gave himself up to police after viewing thousands of sick internet pictures of children began telling his story in The Evening Star yesterday.

The 32-year-old today reveals how family and friends stood by him despite the shocking admission - and how handing himself over to justice was the hardest decision of his life.

BY admitting to viewing thousands of sickening images of children a Suffolk dad turned his world upside down.

Today he tells how his momentous decision to hand himself in changed not only his life but the lives of those around him, and played a key role in the breakdown of his marriage.

The 32-year-old dad-of-three, who shared his shocking story in an attempt to persuade others who look at child pornography to face justice, said he was only too aware that confessing his terrible secret to the police would have grave ramifications for his family.

But he said he had been overwhelmed with the forgiving and understanding response of those close to him following his appearance at Ipswich Crown Court in January when he pleaded guilty to 16 charges of making indecent images of children under 16 and one of possessing indecent images of children under 16.

The man, who does not want to be named because of fears for his family's safety, said: “I thought I was going to lose my wife the day I told her but we stayed together for a year afterwards.

“We split up because I was having a breakdown with everything that happened, but she's still my best friend.”

His three children, who are all below school age, are still too young to understand about their dad, and he said he would leave their mum to decide what, if anything, they should be told.

He said: “My young children know I sometimes have days when I'm not well.

“I feel I have to close the book so that what happened does not affect my children.

“Thankfully it has had a minimal effect so far and nobody has approached my family apart from social services.”

Although initially telling people the awful truth was hard, he said it had since become easier. However, he still doesn't visit pubs where he lives in mid Suffolk or do anything that may antagonise people who feel less comfortable around him.

He said: “I've probably told about 40 people and I've had only one person say 'please can you give us some time and we'll phone you'.

“I've even had people say ''you can babysit my children'. Clearly I can't - but it is nice to be believed in.

“Anyone who is just an acquaintance I don't have to tell but if I'm forming a friendship I tell them and generally the response is amazing.

“If someone wants to break my legs they'll hurt themselves more in the long run than they'll hurt me.”

n Do you think the man was right to speak out? Write to Your Letters, Evening Star, 30 Lower Brook Street, Ipswich IP4 1AN or e-mail eveningstarletters@eveningstar.co.uk

HANDING himself in to face justice was the hardest and best decision he ever made, according to the dad-of-three.

The process was not always easy, especially when it forced him to confront the true horror of what he had done.

He said: “I knew that because I had broken the law I was going to give myself in.

“I've had several people say they are amazed, because I'd have never got found out, that I should have burned the hard drive.

“It's really simple'. I take full responsibility for what I did.”

He said once he had given himself in, his computer was seized during a raid and he was probed during an intensive police interview.

He said: “The investigation was very good. It was very thorough and fair.

“I've been humbled to the marrow of by bones. I've been picked through so that psychologists know everything about me. I found out about the parts of me that never grew up.”

In January, the man appeared at Ipswich Crown Court where he pleaded guilty to all the charges he faced.

The judge gave him a suspended sentence but the man said he would have accepted a jail term considering the gravity of his crime.

He is continuing to have psychological treatment and regularly sees a probation officer.

He said: “I will never re-offend. I know that. But I couldn't prove that and they (the probation service) have to prevent me from re-offending.”