Alex Young was the kind of friend who was with you in good times and bad.
“Six hundred of his friends came to his memorial service, and so many of them said that Alex was a great guy to go to a party with because he was so much fun – but they also said that if you had a problem, Alex was the person you go to,” said Alex’s father, Sir Nick Young.
Sir Nick is the former chief executive of the British Red Cross and Macmillan Cancer support and is now the patron of Suffolk Refugee Support.
He and his wife, Lady Heli, raised their three sons in Corder Road in Ipswich, with Alex being their middle son.
“They were a great threesome together!” remembered Sir Nick. “Down at the pub where we lived at the time, the Young brothers were a force to be reckoned with!”
Alex cared deeply for his family. His parents cherish a story they learned later from their younger son, Tom, who recalled running a hurdle race at school, and stumbling.
Alex was chatting nearby with his friends – but as soon as he saw his brother fall, he ran over, pulled him to his feet and supported him across the finish line. That was, said Sir Nick, “absolutely typical Alex”.
The boys attended St Margaret’s CEVA Primary School, with the family upping sticks to London where Alex attended secondary school, although Sir Nick and Lady Heli returned to Ipswich.
Alex was a keen athlete, a formidable player on the rugby pitch. He sang in the choir at St Mary-le-Tower, now the Ipswich Minster, and played the saxophone.
As he became an adolescent, Alex proved very popular with the girls at school, and was known for his cheeky grin. Lady Heli recalled with amusement arriving at parents evening, with a teacher exclaiming, “Oh, you’re his mother!”
After school, Alex studied at the University of Exeter before entering the world of finance where again, he was highly respected and popular with his colleagues.
He seemed poised for his career to really take off. Then, in 2014, Sir Nick and Lady Heli received the call which is, surely, every parent’s worst nightmare.
Alex had gone missing. After a torturous week of uncertainty, his body was found. It was established that he had died by suicide. He was 31.
“It was a complete bolt from the blue,” said Sir Nick. “It was awful. We and his brothers were completely stunned.”
Almost 12 years have now passed since Alex’s death. But despite this, his memory is very much alive, for his parents, his brothers, and for the many friends who continue to reach out and share their memories of Alex, showing that he is most certainly not forgotten.
“It’s like it was yesterday. We still expect him to appear,” said Sir Nick.
“He’s still with us every day, in every way.”
Sir Nick now sings in the Woodridge Choral Society. Around two years ago, approaching the 10th anniversary of Alex’s death, the choir was singing a piece of music written by the composer Ben Ponniah, about navigating the heartbreak of his divorce.
Inspired, Sir Nick reached out to Mr Ponniah to suggest he wrote a piece of music in memory of Alex.
Mr Ponniah agreed – and to Sir Nick’s amazement, revealed that he had known Alex, with the two attending St Margaret’s together, with Mr Ponniah being a couple of years below.
“He said: ‘Alex was my hero at school. I thought he was so fast, so funny and so friendly,’” recalled Sir Nick.
Mr Ponniah spent hours talking with Sir Nick and Lady Heli and the rest of Alex’s family, and his friends, and has composed a work in his memory which the Youngs are delighted with.
Now, it is almost time for the choral work Carry Me Home to be shared with the world.
The piece is part of a concert being performed by the Ipswich Chamber Choir at St Joseph's College Chapel, Ipswich, on the evening of Saturday, March 21.
The concert will include saxophone solos and a performance of Fauré's Requiem.
Read more
Family of Strictly star speak of 'profound sadness' after suicide ruling
'Every life lost is devastating': MP backs new guidance to prevent bridge suicides
Missing Ipswich man whose body was never found died by suicide, inquest concludes.
This world premiere of the new work will help raise vital funds for Papyrus, a charity campaigning for the prevention of suicide in young people.
Sir Nick and Lady Heli have come to greatly admire the charity’s work, and hope that by continuing to talk about Alex and his life, other young people who are struggling will be encouraged to reach out for help.
“What troubles us most is that night, when Alex was obviously troubled, he didn’t pick up the phone to us,” said Sir Nick. “If he had, we’d have been down there like a shot.
“But there are too many ‘what ifs’.”
Carry Me Home will be performed on Saturday, March 21. To purchase, tickets visit: wegottickets.com/event/674602
Suicide in the UK
The Samaritans estimate that more than 6,000 people across the UK and Republic of Ireland take their own lives every year. In 2024, there were 7,147 cases where the cause of death was recorded as suicide.
More than 1 in 20 people make a suicide attempt at some point in their lives. Only one third of people who die by suicide have been in contact with specialist mental health services in the year before their death.
Males are more than three times more likely to take their own lives than females.
For males, there were 17.6 suicides deaths per 100,000 people in 2024. This was compared with 5.7 suicide deaths for females in the same year.
Samaritans state: “Suicide is complex and most of the time there isn’t one event or factor that leads someone to take their own life. It is usually a combination of lots of different factors interacting with each other to increase risk.”
PAPYRUS aims to reduce the number of young people who take their own lives by breaking down the stigma around suicide and equipping people with the skills to recognise and respond to suicidal behaviour.
HOPELINE247 is the charity’s confidential helpline service providing practical advice and support to young people with thoughts of suicide and anyone concerned about a young person who may have thoughts of suicide.
For practical, confidential suicide prevention help and advice, contact PAPYRUS HOPELINE247 on 0800 068 4141, text 88247 or email pat@papyrus-uk.org
Share