My Pet: Met our guest columnist Winston

Hi, I’m called Winston - I’m not quite sure why - but if anyone comes near me, they will have to fight me for my basket, fight me for my cheeky spot on the sofa or fight me for my old bit of rope in the garden - but I’ll never surrender.

Apparently - so I’m told - I’m like the dog from the film UP. I don’t really know what that means except...‘SQUIRREL’ - sorry I just got distracted by a squirrel. I do that a lot.

My life consists of chasing rabbits and getting people to make a fuss of me. When I give it the eyes, people generally crumble.

Anyway, I’m only a guest columnist because Abbie is away this week and I’ve got to take my human for a walk in a minute - and I’ve got things to chase.

I still don’t understand why I’m called Winston but perhaps I will one day. Apparently, men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened.

I live with my human, John. His dad was 78 this week which is quite old, although you would never know it from the way he carries on. He plays cricket for the village team, although he sometimes has to get someone else to do the running for him. Sometimes, he yells at the runner to hurry up, which makes my human hold his head in his hands, although everyone else just laughs a lot.

As for this column - I guess this isn’t the end - nor is it the beginning of the end - but it is perhaps the end of the - hold on, sorry, SQUIRREL…

• As told to John Nice from Easton and Otley College.

• If your dog would like to submit a guest column one week, write to ealifemag@archant.co.uk